eighty-eight percent.

This is real life.

“Man, I’m hungry. Oo, a commercial for Taco Bell on Pandora! No, no, that’s not a good idea. My stomach and my husband will hate me later. But I want it. I want its greasy 88% real meat, 12% ‘signature recipe’ to fill my belly!”

Fumbles for car keys, gathers belongings, and rushes out the door. Fast forward to a drive-thru window.

“Umm, yeah. Could I have that 9 x 3 plastic bowl full of carbohydrates, fat, cheese, tomatoes (veggie point of the day!), and the substitute you call ‘meat’ in there? Oh, and a large diet coke (that should cancel it out)? Thanks.”

Commence eating devouring a delicious Nachos Bell Grande. Soda in hand, though barely drank, serves as momentary pauses in the cave man-esque eating process. Fingers are drenched in processed cheese, sour cream, and..um…beef? I think?

“Shew. What time is it? Oh, it’s only been 10 minutes? Well, um, my food’s all gone. And I still have 30 minutes before my next class comes in…I wonder if I still have any candy in my purse.”

I like to call that “The Lunch of Poor Decisions and Regret”. It happened today, actually. We all have those meals. And, if you have as little self control as I do when it comes to delectable treats, maybe it happens about 16 of your weekly 21 meals.

16 of 21. 88%.

That about describes my efforts in eating healthy and the amount of ‘healthy’ lacking  in my diet…88%. Like Taco Bell’s meat. An 88% effort toward real, hearty meat. Which means I am literally living out the phrase “You are what you eat” with my 88% meat, my 88% healthy-eating effort, and my 88% amount of ridiculously fatty, high-fructose corn syrup foods that make up my diet.

And those foods are 100% delicious. Take that, 88%.

Inserts cinnamon twist in mouth.


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