i’m sorry if i hit on you.

I’ve decided to start a collection.

Not a collection of keychains, Furbies, or pictures of Obama look-a-likes…although I have at one point in my life collected a LARGE number of one of those items. I’ll let your mind wonder as to which one.

My particular collection is going to be the finest writings, sayings, and utterances of the most genius people one will ever meet. People so smart that they endure hours of lectures and ramblings from those who have conquered their place in life and acquired the title ‘teacher’. People so full of wit and humor that the mere sound of flatulence makes them ROTFL (in their native tongue, “text”, this means to “roll on the floor laughing”. Abbrevs are sups pop with this crowd). People so incredibly confident in their ability to interact with the opposite gender they’re even willing to hit on people 10 years their senior. So just who could this hormone-crazy crowd be?

Yes, teenagers.

And these teenagers’ words need to be recorded and collected! I’m not talking about 140-character blurbs (sometimes words, mostly emoticons) about how excited they are to watch “Jersey Shore <3 <3 :) :) :) :)”. I’m talking about the everyday, non-social-network-recorded words they say. Which, if you ask me, are a heck of lot more interesting than those posted on the internet. As a great movie once said “I don’t know what your generation’s fascination is with documenting your every thought, but I can assure you they’re not all diamonds.” Let’s be honest, most of us are guilty of this. And especially teenagers.

{Disclaimer} I love middle and high schoolers. I spent 4 years of my college career studying how to minister to them, teach them effectively, and create environments where they can grow. They are fascinating and in desperate need of mentors and leaders who will lead them toward Jesus. You remember yourself as a teenager, right? I would have loved having more people to love on me during that time and teach me what it meant to be a person who operates in the real world as a mature Jesus follower. I also happen to think that teenagers are hilarious risk-takers who love to push adults’ buttons. It’s awesome.

Back to my collection. Since subbing in the local schools, I have heard some great additions to this collection of mine. But today, I heard one that takes the cake. I knew this kid was trouble when he walked into class, lifted his shirt up and exclaimed “I need to lose some weight!”. It gets better.

Mrs. A:  So like I said, if you have any questions, my name is Mrs. Armstrong.
student raises hand
Mrs. A: Yes? You have a question?
Student: I’m sorry if I hit on you.

Did that just happen? Yes, it did. In fact, it happens more often than I care to record…online at least. Good thing I’m starting that collection.

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8 thoughts on “i’m sorry if i hit on you.

  1. I too collect these things.

    They are the best! I’m glad someone else finds them as humerus as I do!

    Good luck with the subbing! It sounds awesome!

  2. Thought you might enjoy this…

    Last week I was subbing in a local middle school here. We were in math class and a girl asked me what I did for a living besides subbing. I told her I was a youth pastor and she looked at me, “No you’re not. You’re not wearing a black and white collar.” I guess I missed that class on what to wear as a pastor…

    Same class, fast-forward 5 minutes. The kids are working on their math homework and one girl declares to her friends that she’s Baptist (this is a public school, by the way). Her shocked friend spins around in her chair and says, “Doesn’t that mean you worship Buddha?” Even I couldn’t stop laughing…

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